Tuesday, November 9, 2010

A hard lesson learned

This last month has been . . Lets's just say it's been eye-opening. I will back track.
Starting with the middle of September I have been sick. There have been a few days sprinkled in there of wellness, but few and far between.

And I have to say wellness with a loose translation, think Charlie Brown version of Much ado about Nothing and you will be close.

Moving on . . .

I have had 3 viruses and a bacterial sinus infection and now that I am recovered from those my body is the equivalent to Haiti in the aftermath. So now I am taking meds to recover some semblance of normalcy. Like being able to taste and smell, hear out of BOTH ears and not break out into a coughing fit at the drop of a hat. Oh, and I would love to stop "purring" as my husband calls it when I breathe. Yes, that would be nice.

Just so you don't quit reading and think this whole post is one big pity party I should probably move on (just remember this is the back track part).

I have had a lot of time to sip tea and think about what God is trying to get across to me, there has to be a point, right? I mean I'm not dead, Thus far and no farther. Like in Isaiah when The Assyrians destroyed, pillaged and plundered their way to Mt. Nob at the very edge of Isreal and God reminded them that they were merely an ax in his hand, but He wields the ax. All of this is just an ax in His hand and He is wielding it for a reason.

I realized that in the midst of the flurry of activity that is really my life I take a LOT for granted.

*Like all of my senses,
*that my husband will pick up the slack and stay out of the whirlwind when it's in motion, or get hurt.
*That doing is more important than time spent and
*that I have it all under control, all the hats are fitting and the plates are spinning beautifully
*Like sleep

Well I have realized that I was off. Way. Off.
I can now smell coffee and taste garlic. Have you ever realized how wonderful each taste and each smell are? I have relished each new pin prick that has come my way, THANKFULLY!
At one point I was so sick that Scott had to totally take over, Everything. And yes he was still working full time and coaching football. I am not the only one that can do my job. None of us are. It's a gift and I need to be thankful for it. He is an amazing husband and very patient with me and I need it. I need LOADS of patience.
It is a blessing to hug my children. Something I couldn't do for a couple days since I was so sick and contagious. At one point all I could do was sit on the couch and sip tea with them and listen since I couldn't talk at all. For days. So God taught me to listen and be thankful for them individually.
The hats fly off and the plates shatter, but that's good they are just a distraction when I should be thanking God for what I have and cherishing it while I do.
Sleep is just now rearing it's head in my life. I have been with out it for so long that I have been surprised by it's sneaking up on me. Today I woke up and said, "Scott! I didn't wake up in a coughing fit all night!" This was the first time in I don't know how long. I was so sleep deprived long before I was sick because I would take my time after everyone went to bed and finish everything up, getting me to bed way too late to be happy, healthy or productive the following day. God has brought me from square one, where I need even an hours sleep unhindered to a full night with a thankful heart.
The theme is thankfulness and it is what He calls us to be. Some of us are just more thickheaded than others and need to be given a harder taskmaster. Twice the bricks in 1/2 the time. Yowch.